"Chaoten zündeten Schanze an," screamed a headline this week in Bild-Zeitung, the gazette of choice for Germany's average, knuckle-of-pork Ottos. It seems that leftist rowdies had rampaged again in Schanzenviertel, a colorfully combustible low-rent district of Hamburg.

It's telling that leftist rowdies, not rightist ones, got stuck with the name "Chaoten," which has no equivalent in English and can be loosely translated as either "scatterbrains" or "rioters," "brawlers." Is a rightist mob less "chaotic" than a leftist one? In a certain sense, yes: A leftist mob generally vandalizes property indiscriminately, and leaves people (except cops) alone. A rightest mob generally attacks people discriminately (selecting blacks, gays, foreigners, etc.), and leaves property (except that of blacks, gays, foreigners, etc.) alone.

"Chaoten" is more negative than "Rechtsextremisten," the latter being merely descriptive while the former is disparaging. "Chaos," after all, is anathema in Germany, where order, discipline, cleanliness, hard work, etc. are held up as national virtues, if not always upheld. Whenever Teutonic order goes awry, Germans see "chaos." A traffic snarl is "Verkehrschaos." A heavy snow results in "Schneechaos." Then there's Regenchaos. Regelchaos. Rechtschreibchaos. Schulchaos. Familienchaos. Arbeitschaos. Urlaubschaos. Umzugschaos...

Chaos. Chaos. Chaos. It lurks everywhere.

The fear of, and aversion to, chaos may explain why German authorities -- even in former Communist East Germany -- historically have appeared "blind in the right eye" ("auf dem rechten Auge blind"), i.e. more tolerant of right-wing extremists than left-wing ones.

For all their faults, Faschos at least want order.